Where's global warming when you need it?

Walking around campus the last two weeks has been a very sad time. It's been cold, what the hell?!? This is the prime time for beautiful spring weather. During class change I should be floored with the amazing parade of short skirts, tank tops, and bared midriffs. And what do I get instead? Jeans, parkas, and those terrible, terrible, horrible Himalayas sherpa boots.

So I finally snapped today. I think I might have heard a rumor, somewhere that carbon dioxide and methane will warm up the atmosphere, so I'm doing my part! My car has been running all day and I had a huge lunch of burritos and apple juice. So basically every five minutes I've been running outside to fart and yelling, "Fly, fly my methane farts, warm the world and bring back my low cut tops and hi cut skirts!!!"

I kind of think I need to have some more coffee.